Dangerous nail files, for when things get heated in the office…

Posted by Lipglossiping On October - 15 - 2012

The sky outside is slowly darkening, the tea lady was last seen leaving with the Kit Kats well over an hour ago and is showing no signs of returning. You can’t remember whether you left enough food for the cat and you know that you forgot to set the Sky+ for Eastenders.  For the love of all things way-past-5pm, when is this meeting going to end?

There’s only one thing for it.

Heads slowly turn toward you as you sit there, nonchalantly filing your nails with a chainsaw… or a hunting knife… or maybe a machete…

“We’ll pick this up again on Monday shall we?” says the boss, darting from the room, pushing back her chair with such force that you’re genuinely surprised it didn’t make a cartoon hole in the wall.

Now, to find that tea lady…

‘Dangerous nail files’ are a range of high quality nail files made in the USA in the shape of weapons and tools, designed by Shelly Getzendanner from the School of the Art Institute of Chicago.  They come individually packaged at £7.95 each and will be available at The Conran Shop this month.


2 Responses to “Dangerous nail files, for when things get heated in the office…”

  1. Sydney says:

    I NEED THESE IN MY LIFE.

    On a side note, you have pretty much just summed up my entire day. It’s rather eerie actually..

  2. I’m liking these. I’m not sure if the razor or the bogstandard knife is creepiest. Maybe knife. I think you’d have to stare at whoever was speaking, just stare, not blinking, filing. Perfect. With any luck they might never want to speak to me again.

Leave a Reply

RANDOM

My dirty, smelly little secret...

As if an obsession with all things beauty wasn’t enough to contend with, I thought I’d let you in on one of my other little …

Deal Alert: Nails Inc Magnetic Purple Polish at BuyaPowa...

…for a potential best price of £7.00 inc. shipping. It’s currently sitting at £10 with free shipping and needs a few more buyers to achieve …

The glossiest of boxes. Glossybox for Harvey Nichols

Over the past 5-years, I’ve made a point of not blogging about beauty boxes – I mean, at one stage, there were so many, who …

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month #BCAUK

October is Breast Cancer Awareness month and with one woman diagnosed with the disease every 11 minutes in the UK, it’s a cause that needs …

New! Pantene Colour Protect Range

Pantene are introducing a new range to the UK market next week called Pantene Colour Protect.  It will come in two variants:  Pantene Colour Protect …

I'm off to Paris!

Remember when I won a trip to Paris courtesy of Vaseline? Well, I’m jumping on the Eurostar tomorrow and finally taking advantage of my prize… …

Deal Alert: 25% off at Cult Beauty

For 48hrs only, get 25% off at Cult Beauty with the discount code FLASH25. Perfect for those organised Christmas shoppers out there (I know you’re …

NARS Spring 2011: The Eyeshadow Duos - Bateau Ivre & Nouveau Monde

If you had told me 5 years ago that I’d get excited over the thought of a blue eyeshadow duo, I’d have pointed you in …

Save the sad candle!

Remember when Clintons was all like “OH NOES, WE’RE GOING OUT OF BUSINESS!”. Talk about crying wolf… (I’m joking!!!) But anyway, they marked down loads …

Inexpensive Beauty Find: M&S Limited Collection Nail Polish in Leaf

Going a bit ga-ga in the search for a lovely green polish to see you through the drearier months? Green isn’t a colour you’d usually …

POPULAR

CLOSED: Competition Time: Givenchy Very Irresistible L'eau en Rose Perfume!

Want to really spoil Mum this Mother’s Day?  Or perhaps you just want to spoil yourself?  It’s ok… I won’t judge… there are plenty of …

CLOSED - Win it! The Body Shop Expert Brush Collection

I don’t know about you, but I woke up this morning with a distinct “Hello Monday morning, I’ve been expecting you…” kinda feeling.  Maybe it’s …

Win a gorgeous "glow" trio with prizes from Urban Decay, New CID, & Arbonne!

COMPETITION NOW CLOSED! WINNER IS: “IZABELLA” (COMMENT #96045) – WINNER HAS BEEN EMAILED!   It’s still January, the MET office have just issued yet another …

Hello? Is this thing on?

Phew, that was a little unexpected. For those of you who haven’t had the misfortune of reading my hand-wringing tweets and woe-ridden facebook updates, let …

Big savings on French Pharmacy brands, win my Escentual.com top picks!

I’m of the firm opinion that for the money, French pharmacy brands offer some of the best solutions for diffcult skin-types. Escentual.com have long been …

Win it! 3 EcoTools Bamboo Bronzer Brushes to win!

I’ve written about these before, you know I love them, I want you to love them too! So why not have a go at winning …

Avoid the brush off with Oral-B Pro-Expert

There’s a new toothpaste in town. It’s lean, mean and err not very minty as it happens.  Featuring the revolutionary bacteria-busting ingredient Stabilised Stannous Flouride, …

FOTD Busting out of the comfort zone!

You may recall my bitter moans last week about how when presented with a rare opportunity to spend an indecent amount of time playing with …

Dear Obesity...

We have been together for over 20 years, our lives so entwined that I’ve never been sure how to live without you.  I would like …

Urban Decay The Black Palette - Photos & Swatches

The soon-to-be-released Black Palette from US eyeshadow maestro’s Urban Decay is an altogether darker affair than the recent Naked set… The Black Palette includes 6, …

COMMENTS

  • Categories

  • Archives

  • Admin

  • Ads