Dear Obesity…

Posted by Lipglossiping On November - 12 - 2010

We have been together for over 20 years, our lives so entwined that I’ve never been sure how to live without you.  I would like to tell you that you’ve been nothing but a miserable companion… but I would be lying.  At times, you’ve been a comfort, an invisibility blanket that has shielded me from the world,  holding my hand every step of the way.

Beside me throughout my childhood and teenage years, you often held me back from enjoying myself but I can’t deny that when the going got tough, you would be there to remind me that you were the only thing I would ever need in life anyway.  We were thankfully never bullied for our friendship, though both knew that it was almost impossible not to be pitied.

You regularly made me sad, insecure and doubtful of a happy future with your controlling ways… but despite your omnipresence, I have only fond memories of those formative years.  Further down the line, you shared those first precious moments with my husband, I think you knew I’d kick your arse if you interfered.

Every photo of every holiday, party and get-together… even on my wedding day… you’re there.  My shadow.

I still often question whether it was you that screwed with my hormones, or if we were only tied together because of my hormones…. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to put the chicken before the egg.  Regardless, it was then that you settled in for the long haul… knowing that I wouldn’t have the strength or the willpower to leave you for good.  When they said that I wouldn’t be able to have children without intervention, I turned to you for comfort… and you obliged, like you always do.

But then something clicked.  I don’t even know what or why, there was no lightbulb moment, no flash of inspiration… nothing that I can pinpoint as the moment I realised our relationship had to come to an end.  Like a drip feed, I started to wean myself off you and out of your controllling grasp.

It’s been a long road… 3 years in the making.  Through this time… I have stumbled and fallen back into your waiting arms many times… enjoying the familiarity that you provide… but it never lasts long before once again, you become the abuser and my body, the abused.  Conceiving Leila naturally served to remind me to ignore your parasitic sweet nothings that attempt to shatter my resolve.  I know that you don’t mean to hurt me, you just can’t live without me.

So today, it’s with a strange mixture of loss and overwhelming joy that I tell you something:

I’m leaving you and you won’t see me again.


This morning I weighed 12st 12lb wwith a BMI of 29.7, meaning I am overweight and no longer obese.


Please excuse this post.  It’s a bit of a For Leila one… but well… For me.  I just really wanted to record it, somewhere.

89 Responses to “Dear Obesity…”

  1. Sam says:

    Wonderfully heartfelt. I can’t deny the tears in my eyes. Massive Congratulations.

  2. Jade says:

    Congrats on your loss, it’s fantastic and inspirational 😀


    this is such an amazing achievement and i commend and applaud you for getting there!

    here’s to saying goodbye to overweight eventually. i know you can do it :)

  4. Debbie says:

    Many many congrats, you must be feeling very proud of yourself it is such hard work. I have to say you write really well, that was a very moving and inspirational post. Have a lovely day.

  5. Ailsa says:

    V. inspirational post (and well written too)! Well done and I hope you and overweight don’t get on and you move in with Normal Weight soon! x

  6. Louise says:

    Ahhh, Love this post – keep on going, you’re doing so well xx

  7. Kimberley says:

    Hey Charlotte! Congrats darling!!! Thats a great achievement. If you dont mind me asking what was your start weight? Ive been dieting!!! (they say its a change of lifestye-which im only just getting to grips with) Healthy Eating for around a year now (Nov 09) and have lost 6 1/2 stone so I can still releate to every single word. Dress size 24/26 – to a comfy 12/14- and LOVING it! As you well know its a long road with many ups and downs but with hard work and dedication I made it, and am certain not to go back to my old bad habits. So if anyone is reading this,and wants to start today- IT IS possible, you just need to want to do it for yourself firstly before anyone else then put your mind to it. The Doctor would say oh you should lose weight it will be better for you etc etc, however I didnt want to. You cant loose weight untill you are ready to, no matter who tells you. Then one day I woke up and thought ‘today is the day, not tomorrow, not Monday but today! That was my turning point and I havent looked back. I hope all the lovely ladies reading Lipglossiping today have a wonderful Friday!.

  8. Dempeaux says:

    You’re amazing. I’m so impressed. I look forward to more tales of your success xx

  9. Patricia says:

    Best thing I’ve read in ages on the blogosphere. I know you don’t like to be hailed as brave, but that’s what you are. Thank you for inspiring us.

  10. danni ogier says:

    I was close to tears reading this, which could have been a bit embarrassing given that I’m on the bus to work right now! I am so, so SO PROUD of you! Seriously, what you’ve achieved so far is totally f*cking AMAZING and something that so many people say they will do and then never follow through on. I know that you can do this, just keep it up :)


    (ps, week 5 starts on Sunday, aaah!!!)

  11. Wonderful post. Well done, so so happy for you x

  12. tiptoe shortbread says:

    Truly inspirational! I’ve only been reading your blog for about 6 months and think it’s fabulous the amount of will power you show!! You go girl!!!

  13. GlossQueen says:

    Congratulations! You must be so proud of yourself and your achievement!

  14. Charlie says:

    Congratulations. Its a great feeling.

  15. Jade says:

    Thats so good to read and congratulations so far! I feel exactly the same, no lightbulb moment although the impending wedding day of a friend that is more like my sister may have been inspiration. I haven’t done nearly as well as you . . .YET… but I will get there, over a stone off in a month and hopefully the end to the same old story “You’d be so pretty if you lost weight”. Also finally I think I want to be loved and I know its selfish to ask someone else to love me until I love myself. X

  16. Congratulations on your massive achievement. I have battled with my weight since childhood so what you’ve written has tremendous resonance with me. I’ve been everything from an 18 to a size 10 and back again. Being fat is almost become my default setting though.

    Reading your success has spurred me on, I’m dieting at the moment but I could feel a lapse coming on. I wish you great success in your continuing journey.
    Jane x

  17. It’s a very moving and inspirational post, Charlotte, thanks a lot for sharing. Having been all BMI’s between 29 and 18 myself, I can relate (I’m at 21.9 right now). It’s going to be a life-long battle but it’s ok, we’ll deal :)

  18. Grace London says:

    *stands up and applauds*

    Really pleased for you Charlotte. Really pleased. x

  19. Mizzworthy says:

    Amazing. I’m really happy for you and I totally get how much this really means. I’ve still got a long way to go til I can wave off obesity, but this post has completely inspired me to get on with my weight loss. Well done you!! Xxx

  20. AlicatAHL says:

    Blimey, that made me tearful! Well done, it’s such a hard road to travel. I’ve been on and off it many times, and it’s no easy ride. Don’t be too hard on yourself if you have a wobble. Just pick yourself up and get back on the wagon! Xx

  21. sarah says:

    woohoo congrats you!

  22. ams says:

    Well done mrs – great achievement! Delighted for you x

  23. Elwing says:

    I’m so proud of you. You’re brave for writing this, and I applaud your prestation! You’ve done very well.

  24. Congratulations! It takes guts (no pun intended) to take a long look at yourself, your lifestyle and achieve your goals. You deserve to feel proud, and I am proud of you too. Leila is one lucky little lady. You may be a loser (pun intended this time) but you’re also a great Winner! :)

  25. Natalie says:

    Congratulations hun that’s amazing – lovely post xxxx

  26. Elsie Barley says:

    You need the man from QVC! Well done, you should be very proud of yourself.

  27. Muchos congrats! I lost 2.5 stone a while back but sadly a lot of it has crept back on… Meh.

    A sincere well done and I wish you all the motivation in the land to keep it up – I know how ruddy hard it can be :) xx

  28. What a great post. Well done you missus. xx

  29. Esteeem says:

    omg thats lovely!! keep going, I graduated last year in Nutrition and I’m really proud of people who push themselves!
    I’m currently running healthy eating sessions on Tuesdays and the turnout has mainly been women.. and some of them are classed overweight, some of them obese. It’s not just BMI people need to worry about, its also waist measurement as the fat stored in the upper body is more dangerous than pear shaped individuals. Also, waist to hip ratio is a good measure.

    I love it when people actually want to make that step to lose weight if they’re classed “obese”. It’s a harsh term in all honesty, but it works when people think omg I’m “obese”.

    Keep eating healthy & exercise more, I’ve found two videos I personally love doing, ones bellydance:

    If you do all four parts of the video on youtube, I guarantee out of breath-ness!

    keep it up =)

  30. Joice says:

    Congratulations! I’m so happy for your loss!

  31. Meeta says:

    Congratulations! This is a really beautiful and inspirational post, well done on your achievement!

  32. Caroline says:

    Really well done! This is an amazing post! Losing weight is such a great feeling, congrats :)

    • beautyh2t says:

      Charlotte- this is amazing, and feels like a lot of it came out my mind, I am chasing that exact same goal and now I am only a couple of pounds behind you. Well done, you have done amazingly, I have so much respect for you.


  33. PlatinumV says:

    Excuse me, but I am not from UK and I don’t use your same measure units. Can you please explain to me what does “This morning I weighed 12st 12lb wwith a BMI of 29.7” mean? Thank you.
    PS: congratulations!!!

    • Ann says:

      12st means “12 stone”, a stone is 14 lbs, so you can do the math yourself (12 x 14) + 12
      (American living in the UK – I used to be baffled by this system!)

    • 81.6kg 😉

      BMI is a measurement that stands for Body Mass Index. Anything over 30 is considered obese x

      • PlatinumV says:

        Thank you, now it makes sense! I knew what a lb is, but I’d never heard about “stones” 😛
        Congratulations for your result! And congratulation for you NEXT result 😉

  34. Gemma says:

    Huge, ridiculous, ginormous, mahoosive congratulations. I know how much willpower, determination, hard work and ignoring of meddling fools that it takes to do this. You’re on the home straight now. x

  35. Didi says:

    You made me cry this morning but I still love you!

    Congrats my luv ;o) xXx

  36. Jo says:

    Long time reader, first time commenter…
    I love your posts by the way, but i just wanted to say:
    CONGRATULATIONS! and keep up the good work :)

  37. Anitacska says:

    No need to apologise, you should be shouting it from the rooftops! 😀 Well done Charlotte, this is excellent! (Oh and for the record, you and I weight the same and we appear to be the same height because my bmi is the same as yours. How weird?!)

  38. Leone says:

    Look, I can relate to every sentiment penned here. Addressing obesity as an actual entity…wow, really gives a different perspective. Brilliant! This post is so well written it just about brought me to tears. You are brilliant and God bless! :)

  39. Hannah says:

    Beautiful post – well done you! xx

  40. Kate Mathewson says:

    Congratulations that brilliant – I am/have been trying to loose weight, knowing someone has done so well it just acts as another push for me to keep going.

    Keep up with the good work, Kate x

  41. Janaina says:

    That was so beautifully written and really brought a tear to my eye! Congratulations on all your hard work! As a kid who was ‘obese’ but thankfully managed to rid myself of the obesity monster and never looked back I commend your efforts! Keep it up! xx

  42. Belle says:

    Congratulations! I’m still fighting my battle with those BMI numbers…sodding doctors!
    Off to the gym so I can say the same soon :)

  43. Karie says:

    This post made me cry, beautifully written. HAve struggled with weight all my life, I’m 28. In fact at the weekend my dad asked me if i wanted him to pay so i could go to a weight management clinic ( i’m a size 18), he was being sweet but I cried so much! I will tackle my weight one day but mentally I’m not up to it at the moment.

  44. 82firemoon says:

    Congrats honey!!!

    I send you a lot of strenght from Spain!!


  45. Mercee says:

    I love the way you describe feelings and just want to say congratulations on your achievement so far! It obviously wasn’t easy and I’m so happy for you that you’ve done so well to date.

    You’re a true inspiration to me whether I can relate directly or indirectly to the issues you bring to the floor. Your strength of character is what spurs me.

    Once again, well done Lady, well done!! xx

  46. Seii says:

    Congratulations!! =) I’m happy you’ve reached a milestone with your determination.

  47. Well done, this was an amazing post to read. I can relate to it a lot. Hopefully I’ll be able to relate to the last part sometime too. x

  48. Cait says:

    amazing! congratulations! and fantastic post :) :) xxxx

  49. karleigh says:

    Beautiful post, you skinny beytch =D x

  50. Ashleigh says:

    Oh, congratulations, gorgeous! This is absolutely wonderful news and a big step for you in your life!
    Your honesty with us is absolutely stunning and it’s a big part of why I love your blog.
    I’ve always been a bit of a, uh,., “chub-ette” and my weight has gone up and down throughout the years, making me worry about the possibilities of diabetes and other health problems that often come with carrying some extra poundage. But like you, there was no “lightbulb moment,” it just happened. I finally realized that this is something I have to do. Not for my boyfriend who loves me as I am, not for vanity, but for myself.
    You are an incredible inspiration to me, and I’m sure to others as well, and I just want to say thank you for posting this. I’m sure that this will be something I come back time and time again, when my resolve is slipping and I start to think things like “Oh, a bit of pie won’t hurt. I don’t have to work out today!” 😉

  51. Nicole says:

    Wow. Extremely well written and heartfelt post.
    Huge congratulations, and may the road head to “healthy weight” be a smooth journey, and I am sure it will be….just remember, you have a lot to stay healthy for.

  52. Ellie says:

    congratulations charlotte! you are a lovely, beautiful girl and i enjoy reading everything you write. i am happy for you and inspired by your achievement – well done and keep it up! xo

  53. Martina says:

    i’ve seen a picture of you here in the blog and you are very pretty. You should keep on fighting obesity for your health. I’m sure you can win this battle :-)

  54. Ann says:

    Still crying, but that’s probably about me and self pity … wondering what it’s going to take for me to do the same. Your current weight is more or less my first target – to get into the “overweight” category instead of the “obese” category. It’s not so much weight to lose it would be impossible, I just don’t know how to get into that state of mind where I’m actually ready to lose the weight. I thought being married and knowing that love is not dependent on being a particular weight might do it … but it’s not the impetus I need, not yet.
    I don’t know how I’m going to get there, but it is so inspirational to know that it is possible.
    If you ever have any more thoughts on how you managed to change your mindset.

  55. Ann says:

    I meant to say “If you ever have any more thoughts on how you managed to change your mindset, please do share them, I would find any such insight incredibly valuable.”

  56. Christina says:

    I have only recently started reading your blog, but I just wanted to say that this post really touched me and I think you’re really inspirational.
    Keep doing what you’re doing [:

  57. Leah says:

    This almost made me cry. I’m so happy for you. I’ve not known you long (and by ‘you’ I mean your blog) but I wouldn’t wish obesity on anyone, and I say that out of experience.

    I’d always been a chubster, but I like to think my bubbly personality and wit (but not my modesty, obvs) had seen me in good stead friends & relationships wise, and I always told myself I could lose weight any time I could. Then I got ill. An annoying, as-yet undiagnosed, totally unpredictable experience of fatigue and pain which means one day I can walk for 3 miles without a problem, and another time it’ll leave me in agony for a week. So now I’m imprisoned in my own body, fat, 36 and desperate to have a baby. I’ve ruined my life.

    For all these reasons I’m so happy for you, although I don’t know you very well. Congratulations. I know it can’t have been easy. You may know this already, but you rock! x

  58. Megan Anderson says:

    Awesome post! You really are brave, funny, and an excellent blogger. I look forward to your posts every day! The hardest part of overcoming any issue is recognition that you want to do something about it and actually doing it. Life is too short to just sit back and wallow in your problems. The best part of taking action in what you really want for yourself is the example you will be giving your daughter!

    Keep it up no matter how “persuasive” your long-time friend can be!

  59. Nicole says:

    Congratulations Charlotte! That’s a huge accomplishment all ready and I wish you luck in achieving your goals. This was a really inspirational post and I enjoyed reading it very much, thank you for sharing :)

  60. Lucia Luna says:


  61. Miranda says:

    This is great!! And so beautiful and funny at the same time how you wrote it. Congratulations!! What a fantastic moment this must be for you!!

    I´ve been overweight for the biggest part of my life. Right now my weight is ok. And eventhough I´ve never been obese (except when I was pregnant, I looked like a little boedha) I do understand the struggle.

  62. Jan says:

    Missed this because I was on a different planet this morning. I am delighted for you, truly delighted, well done. Jan x

  63. redtiger21 says:

    God bless, that’s fantastic xxxx

  64. ozlem says:

    I love your humor. It makes reading whatever you write fun and insightful.

  65. Oceane says:

    I’ve recently lost 56kg in a year and a half. My life has changed so much. I have been obese most of my life. When I read this blog it made me cry. It reminded me on how far I have come. I have gained more confidence than I ever imagined. It’s no longer a chore to go clothes shopping. I get a high when someone comments on how small I am. I’ve never been small in my life! I still go into plus size clothing stores and no longer fit their clothes. At times I still think I am big. The downside is that I have lost some friends because of the weight loss. I guess, I’m not considered the loser anymore and now more a competion. What keeps me going is my beautiful little girl and the love of my husband. He loves me fat or thin.

    A big congratulations to you on your weight loss.

    • Ann says:

      I just wanted to say, I found your comment very touching, and any friend who would ditch you because of such a great accomplishment isn’t a friend worth having, and you deserve better (we all do).

  66. clairem says:

    well done!!! that feeling of achievement is great!does wonders for confidence. congrats!

  67. Em says:

    Loved reading this post…I’m struggling with my own weight right now and it feels great to read this. Thanks for posting this and congratulations!

  68. Nicole D says:

    I just wanted to throw in my commiseration and support and congratulation. I really love your blog and read it every day. : )

  69. danielle says:

    You are an amazing lady, and I adore the heck out of your blog. Keep on fighting the good fight!

  70. applepark says:

    Congratulations!! Thank you for sharing this memorable moment with us (your readers and supporters!). Probably like a lot of other people here, I struggle with my weight constantly. I’m really happy for you that you made it to this milestone! Keep going and enjoy every step of the process. You have a lot of people cheering you on :)

  71. Ritu says:

    Lovely post…it inspires me to work harder to reach my goal weight. I started at 14 st 3lbs 5 months ago (BMI in obese range) and i’m so glad to tell you that I am 12st 5lb now. yay! It feels great to finally accomplish this feat since I’ve been a chubby person right from kindergarten.
    My best wishes to you for your future. Love your blog!

  72. amanda says:

    you are lovely both inside and out! i’m really happy that you don’t let yourself be put down.. although I know it must be tough to go through it xoxo

  73. Lisa says:

    You don’t need no excuses to post this. Good post.

    But I’d like to add one thing fat has going for it and that is that those extra pounds keep you warm during the winter-time. You don’t miss that until it’s over and done with though..

  74. Fantastic says:

    Congratulations! You deserve to be so proud of yourself..this made me tear up, knowing that you are making such a huge life-changing decision. I’m so proud of you!

  75. Sarah says:

    woah, well done! you should be very proud of yourself! i think you now have the perfect excuse to buy a whole new wardrobe! :)

    lots of kisses xxxxxxxxxxx

  76. Dani says:

    This is just so emotional and well-written, I have to congratulate you not only on the superiority of your writing but also on the way you’re changing something you don’t like about yourself, it takes a lot of courage, I think, to do something like that and this is inspiring me to do the same :) so congratulations and be DAMN proud of yourself! xx

  77. Bernice says:

    Congrats !
    After reading your post, it made think and reflect about my current weight and how I could be healthier, lighter and more confident. Since I discovered your blog 4-5months ago, I have been a fan and a follower. You blog with all your heart and I learn lots of things from you and this post is inspirational.

    Thank you and take care! =)

  78. Tina says:

    I ‘m sure this was not the easiest of posts to make, but kudos to you for making it!!!
    And of course you deserve a lot of congratulations on seeing results in your journey towards being healthier!
    You are truly an inspiration Charlotte!!! :)


  79. Emz says:

    Fantastic post Charlotte & huge congratulations to you – I’m sure Leila is very proud of her mummy :)

  80. I know I’m late commenting on this but I still had to say- wow, what a beautiful post. Well done on what you’ve achieved so far and good luck with continuing the work. Big hugs xx

  81. tass says:

    A beautifully written post. Well done for all the weight you’ve lost so far. So happy for you xxxx

  82. Sarah says:

    I’m so moved. You’re so wise. xx

  83. Very well written article and thanks for sharing it with your readers. You are so wise and amazing person. xxx

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