Fake Bake – The future of sunless tanning?

Posted by Lipglossiping On February - 10 - 2010

I don’t claim to be a fake tan expert.  Infact, I’m the opposite.  I’m your bonafide fake tan dunce.  I’m so pale that in certain light my skin takes on that blue/grey fishbelly tinge… blue/grey… fishbelly.  Sexy.

Bronzed is something I’ll never achieve naturally.  I went to Australia for 9 months and friends still dine out on the fact that I returned paler.  I have been endlessly fascinated by fake tan solutions, but infinitely frightened of waking up the next morning looking like a bad parody of a Ganguro girl.

Fears aside, my interest was piqued when I saw a press release for Fake Bake’s new Platinum Facial Self Tanner.  It describes itself as the next generation of self-tan.  “Why?” I hear you cry… (yes, I do!) …because my dear readers, it contains pioneering Apple Stem Cell Technology.

“What’s Apple Stem Cell Technology?” I hear you ask, mouth’s wide open in anticipation… (shut up, you’re practically on the edge of your seats innit).  Dunno… hands up if you know what Apple Stem Cell Technology is?  I take it we’re talking Granny Smith’s finest and not Steve Jobs right?

Oh no wait… *reads press release*… ok… check this:

Not just ANY Swiss apple. RARE Swiss apple.  They only fall from trees on a Tuesday in a month beginning with the letter J and only if it’s a full moon.  Of course, I jest… I’m really none the wiser though.  But it sounds good, and I think I might want some regardless.

Just think though, how mega young would we look if  we actually ATE this RARE Swiss apple instead of fake tanning with it?  Maybe that’s Demi’s secret? The apples are only rare ‘cos that greedy bitch is having them shipped by the container load direct to her breakfast table.

Wanna know how to get your hands on this RARE Swiss apple goodness, and get bronzed and gorgeous while you’re at it?

Fake Bake Platinum Face Self-Tan is launching into Salons and retailers nationwide this month priced at £29.95.


6 Responses to “Fake Bake – The future of sunless tanning?”

  1. Maybe if we all ate rare Swiss apples we’d turn into Benjamin Button and start ageing backwards, until we’re eventually a fetus 😀

  2. Lucy says:

    I don’t get it – why is the rare apple making it so much better? I feel so confused…

    I do like Fake Bake though, so maybe I’ll try it – I’m such an easy sale.

  3. Suka & Spice says:

    I’m with you on this one–I never use tanning products…or else I can count the number of times on one hand. I don’t totally get the appeal, and I’ve spent AGES in the s.pacific, to return to the cold weather, not be a shade darker. Although the flip side is..if I’m to stand outside in the sun for even a minute, you’ll find a purse, backpack or tanktop tan line.

    I will say though–the packaging on this one, and the rare swiss apple thing makes me a bit intrigued… leave it to you to find it :)

  4. Redtiger21 says:

    Yeah i don’t spend much time with fake tan stuff- i have a bottle of St Tropez that i used once nearly 5 years ago, daren’t use it now cos it’s probably gone manky, yet i’m loathe to chuck it out as it’s only half empty! I sometimes use gradual tanners, but even that’s a bit of an effort cos they streak sometimes, and despite what anyone says, i can STILL smell the fake tan-ny smell!

  5. NV Beauty says:

    Yes, I agree with the fake-tan scent! You can always smell it–sooner or more often times, later.

    Let us know if you used this and how it worked–unless I missed that post.

Leave a Reply

RANDOM

Deal Alert - Free Delivery online at Illamasqua.com - no minimum spend!

Morning! Hope you’re reading this from the comfort of your beds, I intend to still be fully tucked up when this post goes live – …

PSA: Did you get overcharged at Debenhams?

Last weekend, Lipglossiping reader Charlotte (what a great name!) alerted me to the fact that Debenhams online were charging £35 each for the new Limited …

Inglot Cream Concealer – Review

I bought this cream concealer from Inglot earlier in the year (around the same time as I picked up the MUFE full cover concealer).  I …

Swatch Saturday – The Body Shop Baked Eye Colours

Have you been lemming the new mineralize shadows from MAC’s In The Groove collection but can’t quite stretch to £15 a piece? I’d like to …

Food Friday: Diet-Friendly Eggs Benedict!

I can take or leave breakfast. I know you’re supposed to eat it religiously… that it kick-starts the metabolism for the day. What is it …

This is a PSA*

If you don’t read anything else today or even this week, please read this fabulously funny piece on self-portrait trends. That is all. *Public Service …

The Wall of Nails…

Just a little something I slaved over last night… Something I would dearly love to improve is the navigation of this site.  I’ve always been …

Five head-turning pinks to get your lips looked at!

A makeup artist once told me that straight men don’t like bold lips. They can feel intimidated by a statement colour and don’t consider these …

BBLL – Saturday 19th June 2010

~ Over at theNotice, Rae talks about a new Burt’s Bees lip balm… and how it reminds her of an old Lip Smacker! ~ Maggie …

Deal Alert: Elemis and a very special November TSV with QVC

Father Christmas must be feeling particularly generous this year because Elemis have released details of an exceptionally tempting Today’s Special Value (TSV) with QVC this …

POPULAR

CLOSED: Competition Time: Givenchy Very Irresistible L'eau en Rose Perfume!

Want to really spoil Mum this Mother’s Day?  Or perhaps you just want to spoil yourself?  It’s ok… I won’t judge… there are plenty of …

CLOSED - Win it! The Body Shop Expert Brush Collection

I don’t know about you, but I woke up this morning with a distinct “Hello Monday morning, I’ve been expecting you…” kinda feeling.  Maybe it’s …

Win a gorgeous "glow" trio with prizes from Urban Decay, New CID, & Arbonne!

COMPETITION NOW CLOSED! WINNER IS: “IZABELLA” (COMMENT #96045) – WINNER HAS BEEN EMAILED!   It’s still January, the MET office have just issued yet another …

Hello? Is this thing on?

Phew, that was a little unexpected. For those of you who haven’t had the misfortune of reading my hand-wringing tweets and woe-ridden facebook updates, let …

Big savings on French Pharmacy brands, win my Escentual.com top picks!

I’m of the firm opinion that for the money, French pharmacy brands offer some of the best solutions for diffcult skin-types. Escentual.com have long been …

Avoid the brush off with Oral-B Pro-Expert

There’s a new toothpaste in town. It’s lean, mean and err not very minty as it happens.  Featuring the revolutionary bacteria-busting ingredient Stabilised Stannous Flouride, …

Win it! 3 EcoTools Bamboo Bronzer Brushes to win!

I’ve written about these before, you know I love them, I want you to love them too! So why not have a go at winning …

FOTD Busting out of the comfort zone!

You may recall my bitter moans last week about how when presented with a rare opportunity to spend an indecent amount of time playing with …

Dear Obesity...

We have been together for over 20 years, our lives so entwined that I’ve never been sure how to live without you.  I would like …

Urban Decay The Black Palette - Photos & Swatches

The soon-to-be-released Black Palette from US eyeshadow maestro’s Urban Decay is an altogether darker affair than the recent Naked set… The Black Palette includes 6, …

  • Categories

  • Archives

  • Admin

  • Ads