Fake Bake – The future of sunless tanning?

Posted by Lipglossiping On February - 10 - 2010

I don’t claim to be a fake tan expert.  Infact, I’m the opposite.  I’m your bonafide fake tan dunce.  I’m so pale that in certain light my skin takes on that blue/grey fishbelly tinge… blue/grey… fishbelly.  Sexy.

Bronzed is something I’ll never achieve naturally.  I went to Australia for 9 months and friends still dine out on the fact that I returned paler.  I have been endlessly fascinated by fake tan solutions, but infinitely frightened of waking up the next morning looking like a bad parody of a Ganguro girl.

Fears aside, my interest was piqued when I saw a press release for Fake Bake’s new Platinum Facial Self Tanner.  It describes itself as the next generation of self-tan.  “Why?” I hear you cry… (yes, I do!) …because my dear readers, it contains pioneering Apple Stem Cell Technology.

“What’s Apple Stem Cell Technology?” I hear you ask, mouth’s wide open in anticipation… (shut up, you’re practically on the edge of your seats innit).  Dunno… hands up if you know what Apple Stem Cell Technology is?  I take it we’re talking Granny Smith’s finest and not Steve Jobs right?

Oh no wait… *reads press release*… ok… check this:

Not just ANY Swiss apple. RARE Swiss apple.  They only fall from trees on a Tuesday in a month beginning with the letter J and only if it’s a full moon.  Of course, I jest… I’m really none the wiser though.  But it sounds good, and I think I might want some regardless.

Just think though, how mega young would we look if  we actually ATE this RARE Swiss apple instead of fake tanning with it?  Maybe that’s Demi’s secret? The apples are only rare ‘cos that greedy bitch is having them shipped by the container load direct to her breakfast table.

Wanna know how to get your hands on this RARE Swiss apple goodness, and get bronzed and gorgeous while you’re at it?

Fake Bake Platinum Face Self-Tan is launching into Salons and retailers nationwide this month priced at £29.95.


6 Responses to “Fake Bake – The future of sunless tanning?”

  1. Maybe if we all ate rare Swiss apples we’d turn into Benjamin Button and start ageing backwards, until we’re eventually a fetus 😀

  2. Lucy says:

    I don’t get it – why is the rare apple making it so much better? I feel so confused…

    I do like Fake Bake though, so maybe I’ll try it – I’m such an easy sale.

  3. Suka & Spice says:

    I’m with you on this one–I never use tanning products…or else I can count the number of times on one hand. I don’t totally get the appeal, and I’ve spent AGES in the s.pacific, to return to the cold weather, not be a shade darker. Although the flip side is..if I’m to stand outside in the sun for even a minute, you’ll find a purse, backpack or tanktop tan line.

    I will say though–the packaging on this one, and the rare swiss apple thing makes me a bit intrigued… leave it to you to find it :)

  4. Redtiger21 says:

    Yeah i don’t spend much time with fake tan stuff- i have a bottle of St Tropez that i used once nearly 5 years ago, daren’t use it now cos it’s probably gone manky, yet i’m loathe to chuck it out as it’s only half empty! I sometimes use gradual tanners, but even that’s a bit of an effort cos they streak sometimes, and despite what anyone says, i can STILL smell the fake tan-ny smell!

  5. NV Beauty says:

    Yes, I agree with the fake-tan scent! You can always smell it–sooner or more often times, later.

    Let us know if you used this and how it worked–unless I missed that post.

Leave a Reply

RANDOM

FitFlop Mukluk Boots - Work out without working up a sweat?

Toning is something I’m pretty concerned with at the moment.  A very low calorie diet will do more than simply burn fat… there’s a certain …

Glitter Gal Holographic Giveaway!

I love many things… the smell of freshly-cut grass, Leila telling me that my dress looks pretty, a slice of bread devoured hot from the …

Bourjois Elastic Mascara

New out this week is Bourjois’ Elastic Mascara… complete with rather funky packaging! They were putting these out on the shelves of my local Superdrug …

Bobbi Brown Intensifying Long-Wear Mascara

In addition to the new long-wear cream shadows, and eye pencils which I talked about here, the Bobbi Brown Intensifying Long-Wear Mascara* is putting in …

Just a little teaser... Butter London gets Lippy

Never have I cursed Winter as much as I have this past week.  I got my hands on these samples almost two weeks ago and …

Pink Week: Cherry ChapStick goes Pink!

What is it? A special edition PINK Cherry ChapStick offering SPF 15, providing protection from UV rays whilst helping raise money for charity. How much …

The UK beauty blogosphere is abuzz...

…with this wonderfully inventive “All I Want For Christmas” Advent Calender which has launched exclusively at Selfridges. They say: Comprising 24 windows behind which lie …

Beauty Blog Link Love - 8th May 2011

~ Got a lipstick too pale to use straight from the bullet? Regretting buying it? Beauty’s Bad Habit shows you 10 ways to use pale …

Move over Dior, there's a new lemming in town...

Well alright, just budge up a bit – I’m sure I can make room for both of you in my heart… Helena Rubinstein Wanted Stellars …

China Glaze & Hunger Games Collection: Colours from the Capitol (Agro and Dress Me Up)

The soon-to-be released Hunger Games collection from China Glaze has been setting the nail polish blogs alight with swatches and banter about the names and …

POPULAR

CLOSED: Competition Time: Givenchy Very Irresistible L'eau en Rose Perfume!

Want to really spoil Mum this Mother’s Day?  Or perhaps you just want to spoil yourself?  It’s ok… I won’t judge… there are plenty of …

CLOSED - Win it! The Body Shop Expert Brush Collection

I don’t know about you, but I woke up this morning with a distinct “Hello Monday morning, I’ve been expecting you…” kinda feeling.  Maybe it’s …

Win a gorgeous "glow" trio with prizes from Urban Decay, New CID, & Arbonne!

COMPETITION NOW CLOSED! WINNER IS: “IZABELLA” (COMMENT #96045) – WINNER HAS BEEN EMAILED!   It’s still January, the MET office have just issued yet another …

Hello? Is this thing on?

Phew, that was a little unexpected. For those of you who haven’t had the misfortune of reading my hand-wringing tweets and woe-ridden facebook updates, let …

Avoid the brush off with Oral-B Pro-Expert

There’s a new toothpaste in town. It’s lean, mean and err not very minty as it happens.  Featuring the revolutionary bacteria-busting ingredient Stabilised Stannous Flouride, …

Big savings on French Pharmacy brands, win my Escentual.com top picks!

I’m of the firm opinion that for the money, French pharmacy brands offer some of the best solutions for diffcult skin-types. Escentual.com have long been …

Win it! 3 EcoTools Bamboo Bronzer Brushes to win!

I’ve written about these before, you know I love them, I want you to love them too! So why not have a go at winning …

FOTD Busting out of the comfort zone!

You may recall my bitter moans last week about how when presented with a rare opportunity to spend an indecent amount of time playing with …

Dear Obesity...

We have been together for over 20 years, our lives so entwined that I’ve never been sure how to live without you.  I would like …

Urban Decay The Black Palette - Photos & Swatches

The soon-to-be-released Black Palette from US eyeshadow maestro’s Urban Decay is an altogether darker affair than the recent Naked set… The Black Palette includes 6, …

  • Categories

  • Archives

  • Admin

  • Ads