A Makeup & Beauty Blog – Lipglossiping

The problem with being a total beauty nut is that I find myself noticing flaws in my appearance that I’m sure wouldn’t really bother the average woman my age.

My mother has always suffered with hyperpigmentation and dark spots but she’s also about 3/4 foundation shades darker than me, so I’ve always assumed that it’s not something I would have to worry about as a paler skinned lady.

Well, maybe it’s NOT something I should worry about, heaven knows there’s enough “stuff” queueing up ready to be worried about in our day to day lives anyway… but regardless, I have noticed in recent months that my skin tone is looking less even.  I’ve always suffered from broken capilliaries on my cheeks and nose… but I’m also noticing a couple of little patches that I initially dismissed as new freckles.

Freckles all of a sudden? At 28? What… I think I’m Lindsay Lohan or something?  I guess it just sounds better than sun damage right?

Anyway, I’ve read lots about the Paul and Joe Whitening Serum that seems to get decent reviews for it’s ability to fade dark spots and even out skin tone… but my interest has been piqued by this new release from Clinique.

Clinique’s Even Better Clinical Dark Spot Corrector claims to hold the power to even skin tone with results equal to a leading prescription ingredient.  Not only that but…

…this “damage eraser” is gentle and non-irritating and ideal for skins that cannot tolerate other skin brightening treatments.

It goes on to baffle me with science but regardless, if you’ve got skin that’s prone to a little bit of redness… you’ll know that the last thing you wanna do is slap product on that’s gonna accentuate that… a false economy right?

At £37.50 for 30ml, it’s not an inexpensive solution… but in general, these type of whitening/brightening products seem to offer good visible results when you compare them to anti-wrinkle creams.  The Clinique Even Better Clinical Dark Spot Corrector is available from today on counters nationwide.  I’m interested, but I’ll be keeping my eyes open for some reviews before putting my hands in my pocket.

Have you tried whitening creams before?  What do you think?

I received this at a press day in the Medium shade which was too dark for me, but a willing guest reviewer came to my rescue!  She’s tried it… and here’s what she has to say about it!

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I’d like to thank Charlotte for allowing me to be her first guest reviewer!  I hope the experience doesn’t scar her for life, and I hope some of you will find this review helpful.

This is my first experience with the Bare Escentuals bareMinerals range.  They have an excellent track record judging by other reviews, so I was excited to get my hands on this product and try it for myself.

What it claims

The literature that accompanies the product states that the natural mineral sunscreen provides the ultimate sun protection without the heavy, greasy finish.  The micronised Titanium Dioxide mineral instantly shields against UVA/AVB rays to help prevent premature skin ageing and sun damage, is weightless, breathable, non-greasy and won’t clog pores.  It contains vitamins, Aloe Vera extract and antioxidants to promote healthier-looking skin.  It increases sun protection when used under or over your bareMinerals SPF15 foundation.

Presentation

The bottom of the bottle is clear to indicate the colour of the product, and in this case I am using the medium skin tones.  There is 4g/0.14 oz of product.

The ingredients list (for those who can make sense of it!): Mica, Titanium Dioxide (CI 77891), Ascorbyl Palmitate, Tocopheryl Acetate, Retinyl Palmitate, Aloe Barbedensis Leaf Extract, Lycium Chinensis (Lycii Berry) Extract, Ranunculus Ficaria Root Extract, Silica.  Iron oxides, Ultramarines, Bismuth Oxychloride.

The orange and white bottle has a pop-off lid which exposes the brush in the top of the bottle.  The bottom of the bottle is turned to extend the brush, and clicks locked ready for use.  To start the flow of the product, invert the bottle and tap downwards onto your skin until the powder appears.  Then, in a circular motion, you buff the product lightly into your skin.  To close, you turn the bottom of the bottle, the brush retreats back into the bottle and it clicks locked.

So what do I think of it?

I must point out at this stage that my skin is in no flush of early youth.  I will be hitting the big four-oh this year and I am dreading it.  My skin has been well used and has what I like to describe as having all the signs of enjoying a full and happy life.  Having lived in South Africa for 20 years and perhaps not being as religious as I should have been with sunscreen in my teens, I have pigmentation marks that I now regret not preventing and am now kicking myself about. My skin tone is an NC25/30 depending on how much sun exposure I’ve had.

I have a combination skin type, very oily T zone and parchment dry cheek areas.  I’ve had various expeditions into the mineral foundation world, some a lot more successful than others.  My main complaint is that some mineral foundations oxidise on my T zone, leaving an appealing orangey caked effect, whilst my poor cheeks are left looking like powdered parchment, regardless of how much moisturiser I applied beforehand.

The brush extending and retracting back into the bottle is a good idea as the bristles are kept neat and are less likely to splay.  The brush is very soft and kind on the skin, not scratchy at all which is a definite requirement if it’s going anywhere near the sensitive eye area.  It’s a good size too, I thought it would be a lot smaller.  The product didn’t need a lot of encouragement to start the flow, but certainly didn’t flood all over the place either.

The powder itself is pleasantly soft and silky, very finely milled and not at all chalky.  I applied it to my cleansed, toned and moisturised face (after allowing enough time for the moisturiser to soak in completely), using a circular buffing motion.

I felt that my pigmentation marks were a lot less noticeable, and that my skin tone was evened out and looked smoother without being chalky.  I asked Dear Husband what his thoughts were, and he said my skin certainly looked a lot softer and smoother compared to without any product.  The powder didn’t settle into the industrial strength concealer I need to cover my dark under eye circles, and my cheeks didn’t look powdery either.  A good result so far.

I applied my usual mineral foundation on top  to see how it would cope and whether I would look like an explosion in a powder factory, but I only needed to apply a light dusting as the bareMinerals had already done quite a good job by itself.  I would be quite happy to use it on its own to be honest.

As your neck and upper chest area has as much exposure to sun damage as your face, this product can be used all over these areas to offer the same level of protection.

During the day, my T zone had started reminding me that it was indeed my cross to bear in life, but I wasn’t left with any orangey slippage.  Touching up during the day was an easy process because the brush and product were all in one and didn’t take up too much space in my make-up bag.

I think this is an ideal holiday product as it is essentially a foundation and SPF30 all in one.  When I go on holiday, I don’t take a liquid foundation as I want something light which lets my skin breathe,  but I do worry that my mineral foundation might not be enough to protect my skin.  Many facial sunscreens are greasy and cause breakouts around my chin, but as this is a powder product I felt for me it was the ideal solution.

At the price (£25) it would be quite a layout for me and would be considerably more than I would usually pay, but is probably worthwhile as your skin has to last you a lifetime and is worth the expense.

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Thanks so much to Ali for guest reviewing for me!  I think she did a fab job (and I’m hugely jealous of her flippin’ perfect teeth and smile!) – More opportunities for guest reviews coming up soon.

I first read back in January from the inimitable BeautyWooMe that kings of minimalism Muji were introducing their skincare line into the UK and as a huge fan of Japanese skincare, I was chomping at the bit for the release.

Comprising of two core product ranges:

Sensitive Skin: A hypo-allergenic skincare range formulated for delicate, sensitive skins.

The range is:

• Alcohol-free
• Paraben free
• Unperfumed
• No artifcial colouring
• Free from mineral oils

High Moisture: An intensive moisture rich skincare range formulated for dry skin.

• No artifcial colouring
• No added synthetic fragrances
• Free from mineral oils

The High Moisture range also contains Hyaluronic acid known for its moisturising properties and Lipidure ® (Polyquaternium -51), for locking in moisture, protecting and softening the skin.

In addition to the two core ranges, the skincare line also offers a Cleansing Oil (yippee!), a Cleansing Milk and a Cleansing Gel aswell as some rather nifty facial tools such as a Massager, Face Masks, Eye Masks and ever-useful Cotton Pads.

The skincare range starts from a very reasonable £7.95 and combined with the aesthetically pleasing packaging and somehow satisfying experience I always get from shopping in Muji, I’m gonna be making a beeline for the store every opportunity I get.

Or I could just be lazy and order online.

I have a couple of items that I’m testing at the moment so expect a review shortly!

…into beauty brand Elemis!

I’ve mentioned before that I’m a fan of the British luxe brand, but it’s definitely on my ‘treat myself’ list rather than my ‘repurchase regularly’ list.  This stuff is pricey!

However, from the 3rd till the 31st May there’s a rather good deal going on:

The Elemis Rose and Lavender Recovery Regime is a collection of four of Elemis’ top-selling detox products, with some significant savings to be made.

Excuse a little c&p whilst I tell you what each product claims to do:

Cellular Recovery Skin Bliss Capsules (60 capsules / worth £58)

These little gems counteract the damaging effects of pollution and help repair the visible signs of ageing. Each capsule contains Moringa Oil which is clinically proven to have 1700% more anti-oxidant power that Evening Primrose Oil when applied to the skin. The pink Rose Absolute ‘day’ capsule restores a youthful bloom, whilst the green Lavender evening’ capsule helps to balance and repair stressed skin whilst you sleep.

Gentle Rose Exfoliator (50ml / worth £25)

Gently exfoliates the skin, smoothing and revitalising the skins surface and is excellent for use before a treatment mask, it removes dead skin cells making the surface of the skin appear smoother and brighter.

Pro-Collagen Marine Cream (15ml / worth £26)

This is Elemis’ no. 1 best selling product globally! This super lightweight anti-ageing moisturiser is perfect day and night. Containing revolutionary Padina Pavonica, a marine algae that has ability to mimic the skin’s function to boost collagen in the skin and give you youthful skin and is proven to reduce wrinkles and increase hydration.

Pro-Collagen Oxygenating Night Cream (15ml / worth £31)

Apply before bed, this oxygenating night cream increases oxygen levels and in the skin by up to 41%* to help it regenerate speedily. *Independent Clinical Trials 2006

RRP £58.00 / worth £140 / saving over 55%

Available from 3rd May until 31st May 2010 at Elemis’ official online retailer www.timetospa.co.uk, spas, salons and selected retail stores.

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I’ve personally tried the (infamous) Pro-Collagen Marine Cream and became a huge fan…. but at retail price, I can’t really afford my habit… so continue to look elsewhere.  I am very tempted by this offer though…  If you do take advantage yourself, have a quick google for a discount code for Time to Spa, I know there are some around… but I think they all expire at the end of this month – boo!

Of all the samples I was sent from Liz Earle… this is the one (and only) product that I would happily repurchase without any hesitations.

It’s also the one I thought I would like the least.  The one I thought I’d like the most… didn’t do it for me (review coming soon!) and although I love, love the Superskin Moisturiser… that £32.50 price tag puts me off.

Liz Earle Instant Skin Boost Tonic is a toner, something I never use.  It seems like one of those superfluous steps to a routine that I barely have time to squeeze in to my day anyway.  Not only that, but it also contains Aloe Vera… an ingredient I always avoid because I hate that slightly tacky feeling I find Aloe extracts leaves on my skin.

Now… when I think of ‘toner’, I think of ‘cleansing lotions’… which I hate.  I’m a washer (we’ve had this discussion before), I dislike faffing about with bits of cotton wool when all I want to do is go dribble on my pillow for 8 4 hours.  The thing is though, this feels like a treat, an indulgence if you will.  I like indulgences.

I find the Instant Boost Skin Tonic entirely refreshing and after using my cleansing oil, it ensures that every last scrap of oily residue is removed.  The slight tackiness lasts no longer than a minute or two before fading and although I can’t pinpoint any specific skin benefits, I am noticing slightly odd things like my moisturiser absorbing more effectively.

I’ve decanted some of my bottle into a spritzer and I’m also using it to set my makeup or to simply refresh my skin mid-afternoon.  It has a beautiful floral scent that practically screams “countryside!” (minus the cow pats) and which I find quite calming in an admittedly pappy arometherapeutic (is that a word?) kinda way.  It doesn’t leave any unpleasant tingly sensations behind, the slightly-thicker-than-water texture just soothes and cools.  I’m excited to use this in the Summer, I think it’s gonna be amazing after an afternoon in the sun (if we have any).

I should point out that I am actually a die-hard fan of The Body Shop Vitamin E Face Mist for all the same makeup setting/face spritzing reasons above, but I’ve never liked it much as an after-cleansing experience because unlike the Liz Earle, my Body Shop face mist dries me out if I apply with cotton wool.  I think it’s the alcohol, which the Liz Earle Instant Skin Boost Tonic doesn’t contain.

Ml for ml, the Liz Earle works out cheaper than The Body Shop’s Vitamin E Face Mist too.  Bet you didn’t see that one coming did you?  I didn’t!  200mls of The Body Shop’s alcohol and paraben-filled (5 of the 14 listed ingredients are parabens) face mist will set you back £14.  The equivalent volume of alcohol/paraben free Liz Earle Instant Boost Skin Tonic?  £11.50.  Awesomesauce.

I don’t actually like to be proven wrong.  I didn’t think I’d like this, I’ve extolled the virtues of The Body Shop Face Mist to you all for a long time.  But from now on… my money’s going to Liz Earle.

A good citrusy scent is unbeatable for those mornings when you just can’t seem to muster the energy to lift your sleepy head from the pillow.  It’s an energising, invigorating and fresh smell and if combined with a hint of spice then it’s in my shopping basket quicker than a New York minute.

However, I’ve come to the conclusion that citrus is a tricky scent to capture… I’ve sniffed many ‘lemon’ products that quite frankly would be better kept under my kitchen sink than by the side of my bath.

The Body Shop have just launched their Sweet Lemon range, I was given two products from the range at their recent presentation and as a veritable grumpy connoisseur of all things lemon-y… they’re up against a tough nose.

Sweet Lemon Shower Gel – £6

A soap-free, non-drying cleansing gel with luscious lemon seed oil. Lathers to leave your skin feeling cleansed, refreshed, soft and subtly scented.

The Sweet Lemon Shower Gel is nice, it definitely isn’t too synthetic smelling – it’s sharp rather than sweet and lathers up nicely.  I’d like it to leave a little more scent on my skin, but for an “in shower experience” it does the job well.  I think it comes at quite a price though… between me and Mr. L we’d get through 2 bottles of this a month easily, and I wish I could justify £12 a month on Shower Gel, but I can’t.  If your skin isn’t sensitive to soap, I’d suggest trying out a bar of the Sweet Lemon Soap at a much more affordable £2 a pop.

Sweet Lemon Whip Body Lotion – £8

Light and fluffy, this quick-absorbing, non-greasy whipped cream lotion, with rich and velvety natural ingredients, smoothes easily over the skin, leaving it feeling well moisturised, soft and supple. Provides moisturisation that lasts up to 12 hours. Leaves skin scented with an uplifting and fresh lemon fragrance.

The scent of the Sweet Lemon Whip Body Lotion (which again is sharp rather than sweet) lingers beautifully without being overpowering.  The formula feels light and fluffy, sinking nicely into my skin without leaving any greasiness.  I’m not sure how much stock I’d put into their 12hr moisturisation claims for this product as I personally need something heavier to keep my skin supple for that length of time.  I’d give the scent of the range a 7/10 but it really appeals to Mr. L’s nose, and he never gives a crap about stuff like this… so it’s definitely a product I’ll be shopping for when my current one runs out.  As it spreads so smoothly, I don’t think I’d need to repurchase too often either… well, not unless I catch Mr. L at my bottle again *side eye*.

Have you tried the new Sweet Lemon range from the Body Shop?  What are your favourite smells to get you going in the mornings?  Bacon doesn’t count.

I’m a certified skincare fan, but Mr. L hates anything remotely greasy.  Infact, he doesn’t really understand the concept of ‘moisturising’ or why he would ever need to do it.  Machismo aside, that doesn’t stop me getting him to moisturise my back for me when I get out of the shower.  I’m lazy and it’s always nicer if someone else does it don’t you think?

Aveeno sent me a few bits a while ago, and after giving them my unadulterated attention (not easy to do when you buy as many products as me), I’m back to let you know how they performed for me.

I’ll start with the Aveeno Moisturising Creamy Oil.

Not quite an oil and not quite a cream means that it has a hella confusing name!

I wasn’t sure what to expect when I first pumped the lid.  It is a very light, runny cream with a bakewell almondy smell.  I’m not sold on the scent, it’s not offensive in any way… it’s just a bit biscuity for me.

Aveeno say:

• Combines the concentrated goodness of naturally active colloidal Oatmeal and sweet almond oil.
• Provides the benefit of an oil with the convenience of a cream.
• Helps to maintain the skin’s natural moisture level and prevent dry skin.
• Skin is left looking and feeling soft, smooth and healthy without a greasy after feel.

I adored the texture of Aveeno’s Moisturising Creamy Oil, it glides onto the skin with no dragging and I can instantly feel it relieving any tight patches (I suffer from small areas of eczema).  Unfortunately, the cream isn’t rich enough for the effect to last the whole day on me, so if you’re very dry-skinned, I’d look for something a little heavier.

If you have normal skin, I’d whole-heartedly recommend this body moisturiser.  Especially for the Summer and morning applications.  It’s light and absorbs quickly leaving a slight sheen on the skin.  A definite good buy and one that I will be repurchasing.

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Next up is the Skin Relief Moisturising Lotion with Shea Butter 200ml

Shea butter based, it applies thickly and more heavily than the creamy oil.  I’m not a fan of the tube packaging, I seem to consistently dispense too much product.  However, I believe that if you buy the 300ml version of this one, it comes in a pump bottle like Aveeno’s Moisturising Creamy Oil.

My skin feels slightly tacky to the touch after using this and it takes a good 5-10 minutes for absorption to be fully effective.  There’s no doubt in my mind that this lotion is far more penetrating in it’s skin relief than the creamy oil, but it’s not as “light and carefree” to use.  I wouldn’t use this after a shower before getting dressed in the morning… but I have been using it happily before bed where I don’t mind my skin feeling a little tacky.

As for skin benefits, combined use of these 2 products means that I’ve banished my dry scaly bits!  My skin is now Summer ready, so bring on the sunshine (and fake tan).

The Aveeno range is currently £2 off at Superdrug and a 1/3 off at Sainsburys.

Back when February was still so new I was calling it January, I blogged about this:

Hei Poa Pur Monoi Beauty Oil, my skin was bone dry at the time and as a fan of most body oils anyway, I was keen to try another.

I ordered from Zuneta and it arrived within two days with a couple of posh samples enclosed as a bonus!

It’s not particularly attractive in it’s solid state, infact… it’s not at all appetising until you unscrew the lid and give it a sniff.  The unmistakable scent of Frangipani fills your nostrils, a beautiful tropical aroma.

So how do you turn it from that solid, waxy-looking state into a warm oily texture ready for use on your skin or your hair?

I fill a jug with hot tap water and simply sit the bottle in the water whilst I’m in the shower.  It takes about 4-5 minutes to melt completely, but you don’t need to melt the whole bottle.  If you only wanted a little, you could be done in 30-40 seconds.

Not a huge thing… but a point of note is that the labelling on the bottle  is waterproof and has so far remained intact despite being submerged countless times!  I hate paper labels on bath products that disintegrate as soon as they get a splash of water on them!

After about a minute in the hot water, I pulled the bottle out and although you can see it’s not completely melted, there’s enough there for one application.

I find the Hei Poa to be a particularly dry body oil, it’s not massively ‘glidey’ and once I’ve started to spread, it drags a touch on my skin.  The flip-side to that is that I’m not left feeling at all greasy.  It’s a trade off that I’m happy with.  The oil leaves my skin feeling noticeably smoother with a beautiful sheen and delicate scent.

I’m a very happy Hei Poa convert!

What to try next?  The ‘golden glow’ version or the shower/bath oil? – decisions, decisions!

Back in December, I added a box of Daniele de Winter Choc Beauté to my Chrismas Wishlist.

Well who says you don’t get what you wish for?

The box is a lot smaller than I imagined.  Priced at €17.94, you’d kinda hope for something bigger than your hand right?

Remember, the USP (unique selling point) for these choccies is the fact that: “Choc Beauté are delicious chocolates designed to make your skin more beautiful”

Wow, take a look in the mirror Choc Beaute!  You look like poo.  Literally.  Rabbit pooh or Sheep pooh I can’t decide, but some kind of excrement regardless.

So basically, the chocs have added anti-oxidants and vitamins that help battle some of the factors that make skin lose it’s elasticity.  Of course, you could just take some multi-vitamins and eat a healthy diet to get the same benefits, but where’s the fun in that?

But how about the taste test?  That’s what really counts right?

Well… let’s just say… next Christmas, I’m gonna be asking for chocolates that make you UGLY.

…Introducing, AcneApp:

Everyone recognises Apple’s iPhone tag line “There’s an app for that!”, but check out Dr. Greg Pearson’s novel use of the latest in mobile technology.

AcneApp has been developed as a potential mini-alternative to professional light treatment.  It uses 420 nanometer blue light to fight bacteria and 550 nanometer red light, which is said to help kill bacteria and promote collagen growth.

In theory, you could be zapping your zits whilst catching up on the bestie’s latest boyfriend drama.  Or perhaps not, seeing as it’s yet to be clinically tested.  Still, it’s a great way to up your dose of cell phone radiation in the quest for perfect skin.

Deep Skincare are a fairly new Dutch brand that I hadn’t heard of until they contacted me in December to ask if I’d like some products for review consideration.  Taking a look at their ‘about’ page… they seem quite hippy in a love each other, love yourself kinda way.  Which is nice!  Not enough people love me and I could do with some more harmony in my life.

Anyway, enough of all that!  Looky looky leg balm!

Splendid Smooth Legs.  What a rubbish name.  It’s like one of those bad Japanese translations isn’t it?  I think they should have added a “silky” in their somewhere to really tip it over the edge.

Housed in a heavy dark glass jar with a fairly plain label, the product has a nice simple look.  Understated.  I like it.

The first thing you notice when you unscrew the lid is the smell.  Immediately recognisable…  Taking a look at the ingredients confirms the source of the scent: Camphor and Menthol.  Vaporub anyone?  I love the smell of Vicks, but I know some people hate it, so beware!  Once on the skin, it takes about 15 minutes for the scent to fade completely.

The cream is thick but lightweight, a beautiful texture, it feels instantly cooling as it makes contact with the skin, fantastic for weary legs.

Looking more closely at the ingredients, the cream contains Arnica which is widely believed to help reduce inflammation, bruising and encourage the dilation of blood vessels and capillaries under the skin.  Witch Hazel also puts in an appearance on the ingredient list, a natural astringent often put to use as a treatment for varicose veins.

Exactly the ingredients I want to revive and massage into my legs after a full day on my feet.

They say:

Deep: Splendid Smooth Legs sports an invigorating and active formula. A delicious treat to pamper weary or swollen legs. Due to the purely natural ingredients, this balm has a very wholesome effect.

Rather than every-day use as suggested on the jar, I’ve been using this a few times a week.  A small amount goes a long way and leaves my legs feeling refreshed, cooled and less ‘heavy’ than before.  In the Summer, I do a lot of walking and I can’t wait to put it to good daily use as part of a post-bath routine!

While I remember, I also applied this in the middle of the night a few days ago after waking up with cramp in my calf, it really relaxed the tightness in the muscle and for once I didn’t get that limping you get the next morning when you don’t catch cramp in time.  I’d really recommend this as a hugely useful gift for mamas-to-be.  I suffered horrendous leg cramps in my 3rd trimester and would have loved a pot of this.

Do you neglect your legs? I’m ashamed to admit that mine don’t generally get much attention other than a nice shaving gel.  I don’t know why I’m so lax, varicose veins ain’t pretty!

You can purchase Deep Skincare online from their website. Splendid Smooth Legs is priced at £14.21 for 250ml.

If you want to learn more about taking good care of your pins, check out The Leg Room.  What Kate doesn’t know about legs, isn’t worth knowing.

I don’t claim to be a fake tan expert.  Infact, I’m the opposite.  I’m your bonafide fake tan dunce.  I’m so pale that in certain light my skin takes on that blue/grey fishbelly tinge… blue/grey… fishbelly.  Sexy.

Bronzed is something I’ll never achieve naturally.  I went to Australia for 9 months and friends still dine out on the fact that I returned paler.  I have been endlessly fascinated by fake tan solutions, but infinitely frightened of waking up the next morning looking like a bad parody of a Ganguro girl.

Fears aside, my interest was piqued when I saw a press release for Fake Bake’s new Platinum Facial Self Tanner.  It describes itself as the next generation of self-tan.  “Why?” I hear you cry… (yes, I do!) …because my dear readers, it contains pioneering Apple Stem Cell Technology.

“What’s Apple Stem Cell Technology?” I hear you ask, mouth’s wide open in anticipation… (shut up, you’re practically on the edge of your seats innit).  Dunno… hands up if you know what Apple Stem Cell Technology is?  I take it we’re talking Granny Smith’s finest and not Steve Jobs right?

Oh no wait… *reads press release*… ok… check this:

Not just ANY Swiss apple. RARE Swiss apple.  They only fall from trees on a Tuesday in a month beginning with the letter J and only if it’s a full moon.  Of course, I jest… I’m really none the wiser though.  But it sounds good, and I think I might want some regardless.

Just think though, how mega young would we look if  we actually ATE this RARE Swiss apple instead of fake tanning with it?  Maybe that’s Demi’s secret? The apples are only rare ‘cos that greedy bitch is having them shipped by the container load direct to her breakfast table.

Wanna know how to get your hands on this RARE Swiss apple goodness, and get bronzed and gorgeous while you’re at it?

Fake Bake Platinum Face Self-Tan is launching into Salons and retailers nationwide this month priced at £29.95.